LizLetters

Men On Change

U.S. Mint
Department of the Treasury
Customer Care Center
P.O. Box 869010
Plano, TX 75086-9010

Dear Sir or Madam:

    I have very mixed feelings about your recent announcement of a new series of dollar coins. You will be issuing coins bearing portraits of each of our deceased presidents. This could make history lessons much more fun for young collectors.  Indeed it will be a valuable learning tool for all Americans. I’m sure I could not name most of our past presidents, even out of order!
    I am concerned, though, by the fact that these coins nudge out the one venue women have had on U.S. money. Susan B. Anthony reigned on the dollar coin for years, and was replaced by another legendary woman, Sacagawea. Now these ladies must make way for a parade of forgotten presidents.
    This feels somewhat symbolic of women’s role in American history. Women held onto a token place in the world of currency, but will now have to step aside. The mint will reportedly have to continue manufacturing the coin depicting the Native American woman “by law.” Ten-dollar coins depicting the presidents’ wives will be made, but apparently these will be for collectors and not for general circulation, thus relegating the women to the status of being prized and collected, kept within the domestic sphere rather than participating in the world of commerce.
    Perhaps it is better, though, to leave the world of money to the men. Women have been trafficked and used as currency themselves quite enough. Let our figureheads simply guide the ships at sea and our bodies decorate the walls of the Met. At least until there’s a woman president.

Truly,

Liz Mann

The Future Is Plastic

Nancy Nord, Acting Chairman
U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission
4330 East West Highway
Bethesda, MD 20814

Dear Ms. Nord:

    I am sure you are well aware that San Francisco is implementing a ban on products for babies that contain certain chemicals suspected of being harmful and possibly carcinogenic. After becoming a new parent two years ago I began to notice numerous articles on the topic of infant exposure to phthalates and bisphenol A.
    Therefore I was disappointed, though not terribly surprised, to read in a recent news report that your agency has “not limited the chemicals in baby products for years” and that you “have no plans to impose new restrictions.” The same article quotes University of Massachusetts Lowell environmental health professor Joel Tinker, who claims that the potential cost for companies to make safe products is taken into account when regulating chemicals in products. I find this to be disgraceful. If making a product safe is prohibitively expensive for manufacturer, then the manufacturer should be prohibited from making the product.
    The chemical companies and toy manufacturers must have some fantastic lobbyists. I can see no good reason why government agencies should turn a blind eye to potential hazards that are going straight into babies’ mouths.

Truly,

Liz Mann

Buses, Not Busses

Brazilian Embassy
3006 Massachusetts Ave, NW
Washington, DC 20008

Dear Sir or Madam:

    While Brazil is widely recognized for its general sexiness, it is intriguing to learn that in many ways your country holds much more reasonable attitudes about sex than we do here in the United States. While our leaders are busy telling the citizens which forms of sexual relations are okay and which are not, you have a mayor in Novo Santo Antonio handing out free Viagra to the elderly men in his town. Unfortunately, the “Happy Penis” program reportedly inspired some men to stray from their wives. The solution? Of course -- he began to give the pills to the wives! They can then monitor their usage.
    The less thrilling news from Brazil is that in the more urban Goiania a need has arisen for separate commuter buses for women so that they can avoid being groped by men. This is not a problem exclusive to Brazil, of course. In Japan and other locations where strangers are crowded together, people have  trouble keeping their hands to themselves. This does not seem to be a very big problem in the U.S. outside of New York, primarily because Americans refuse to use public transportation in the first place. In New York an innovative web site has appeared on which victims of harassment can post photos of their assailants if they are lucky enough to get a snap of them on a camera phone.
    I hope your matter-of-fact solutions will catch on elsewhere. It will be difficult for us in the U.S., however, to give up our tradition of ignoring an issue until is explodes in a huge scandal.

Truly,

Liz Mann

Penguin Pride

Jennifer L. Filyaw, Superintendent
c/o Shiloh Village School
125 Diamond Court
Shiloh, IL  62269

Dear Mrs. Filyaw,

    I just learned of the flap in the Shiloh Elementary school library over a picture book called “And Tango Makes Three.” The book reportedly is about a pair of male penguins who, as a couple, adopt and raise a penguin chick. Parents have complained that their children can not handle a story about that kind of situation. It is my belief that the only ones who can not handle the idea of same-sex couples are the closed-minded adults. Young children’s minds are wide open, but it takes only a few cues from adults about what is “unacceptable” to begin the process of narrowing kids’ views.
    The penguin book has apparently been sentenced to languish in the nonfiction section of the library as a compromise that avoids the all-out ban many parents seem to favor. This gives credence to the fact that homosexuality occurs in the animal kingdom, and indeed among penguins, but it also appears to be a symbolic dismissal of the story, an attempt to limit its accessibility for the children in a de facto manner.
    I think the best solution would be to add a second copy of the book to your collection and house it in the high-traffic storybook section. As this issue has gained national attention, you would be doing a service for your students as well as school kids around the country where other libraries may follow suit.

Truly,

Liz Mann

Your Own Personal Jesus

David Socha, founder
one2believe
28010 Industry Drive
Valencia, CA 91355

Dear Mr. Socha,

    I am intrigued  by the line of Bible themed dolls you are producing. I became aware of your product as a result of the mini-fracas in the media resulting from Toys For Tots’s refusal of your donation of talking Jesus dolls. I have always meant to become more familiar with the Bible, as it has such a profound influence on our society and culture. I appreciate that you have summaries of fifty important stories on your web site. That can get me started with the basics.
    I do have some questions about your product line. What do these dolls say? And how did you choose the quotes? Though not well-versed in the contents of the Bible, I do know that Jesus said some very cool things. Also, what other characters do you plan on adding to the collection? I am a fan of Oscar Wilde’s play based on the story of Salome, and would probably be in the market for a doll, especially if it were to include seven veils. Is there an appropriate way to intervene if one discovers one’s child switching outfits between Jesus and Esther (you know how kids are!)?
    Thanks for your time. I look forward to learning more about these remarkable toys.

Truly,

Liz Mann

The Scoop On The Potty

Jack Sim
World Toilet Organization, Founder
Restroom Association of Singapore, President
c/o 26 Ubi Road 4
The Besco Building
Singapore 408613

Dear Mr. Sim,

    I found myself wondering why there have been so many stories in the news about toilets lately, and then I discovered on the web site for your World Toilet Organization that in just a few days, on the 19th, it will be World Toilet Day. Everyone must be getting geared up for the big day!
    A piece of artwork at a museum in Italy was recently confiscated, as it featured a toilet that played the national anthem when flushed. I do not know whether the artists involved have any association with your organizations, but they certainly brought the most attention that’s been paid to toilets among art lovers since Duchamp.
    There are news reports here in the U.S. about a widespread phobia of toilets. This affliction apparently affects millions to some degree or other. We can only hope that people take the opportunity on the 19th and make a commitment to changing their relationship with public facilities.
    The most intriguing bit of news, however, was the possible discovery a “communal latrine” near the location where the ancient Dead Sea Scrolls were found. Until I read Mr. Alan Boyle’s article on the subject, I had no idea that the Bible and the Sea Scrolls (and who knows what other sacred ancient texts!) describe release of excrement to be “unclean in the sight of God.” Whatever religious affiliation one has, one cannot escape some influence of the Bible in one’s life. It makes sense that we inherit out attitudes about bathroom habits from generations of yore. There is evidence that the unsanitary conditions of the outhouse from Jesus’ day may have caused illness among the people. Here we are, a couple thousand years later, coming up with endless ways to keep ourselves “safe” in public restrooms. We’ve now had the convenience of those nice crinkly seat covers for quite some time. Then came the blow dryers for our hands, toilets that flushed themselves and water faucets that turned on and off automatically. Towel dispensers have appeared in dozens of remarkable designs in an attempt to keep our clean fingers from touching any communal surface. Now someone had been kind enough to invent a contraption that cleans the bathroom doorknob for us. While sanitation of public restrooms is an important issue, particularly in restaurants and at a very basic level in developing countries, we may have become a little obsessed with the matter.
    I thoroughly enjoyed my visit to your WTO web site. I took the quiz “What Kind of Toilet Paper Are You?” and learned that in the world of toilet paper I am “a pile of dead leaves”! I will be spreading the word about World Toilet Day, and if I can’t find a parade locally I will surely ponder the complex history of the commode on that day.

Truly,

Liz Mann

High And Dry

Jim Whitehurst, Chief Operating Officer
Delta Airlines, Inc.
P.O. Box 20706
Atlanta, GA  30320-6001

Dear Mr. Whitehurst:

    I am writing to inform you that after reading today’s news I will avoid Delta when selecting an airline for traveling in the future. A woman was reportedly kicked off one of your flights for declining to cover up with a blanket while breast-feeding. I am amazed that I still encounter stories of women being banned from nursing their offspring in certain public places. While your staff did not forbid her from offering her child nourishment, I believe she should have been allowed to do so without being asked to hide under a blanket.
    I can understand the response by Southwest airlines to the couple who nearly joined the Mile High club right in their seat(s). As a society we have not quite reached the level of tolerance where we can accept public sex, particularly in such close quarters. Thus I would not suggest that you allow suckling adult men on your flights. Suckling infants, however, should be free to dine in comfort. According to the news report I read, the mother was in a window seat with her husband beside her and “no part of her breast was showing.” I can not understand why she was offered the blanket in the first place. I hope that your future policies reflect an understanding and acceptance of nursing mothers’ rights.

Truly,

Liz Mann

A Bag In A Box In A Bag ...

Ben Bradshaw, Environment Minister
Department of Environment, Food, and Rural Affairs
(Defra)
Customer Contact Unit
Eastbury House
30 - 34 Albert Embankment
London
SE1 7TL

Dear Mr. Bradshaw:

    I just learned of the scandal that recently erupted regarding your misplacement of rubbish and recyclables. I hope this does not create an irreparable shakeup in your department. The most troubling part of the whole thing must be the knowledge that someone is sifting through your bags of refuse whenever you drop them at the curb and just waiting for you to slip up.
    The only reason I learned of this incident, however, is because I was looking into your advice to citizens to leave excess packaging at the counter at the market. Perhaps this idea was born of the scandal. If you don’t bring the trash home to begin with, you don’t need to worry about which bin to place it in.
    I must tell you that while I admire your advice, I am not sure I can do it. Your suggestion would surely work if enough people followed through. Store employees and customers would be annoyed to no end and would insist that manufacturers do something to reduce the quantity of their packaging.
    One of the local markets that I frequent, while I believe they are responsible in many other ways, is guilty of overpackaging some things, produce in particular. This is primarily due to the fact that they do not have scales at the checkout with which to weigh fruits and veggies. When I was there this evening there was great unrest among the masses, as the lines (queues) were bottlenecked with people who stopped in to get a quick cartload of snacks on their way home from work. I believe that if I had started removing apples from clamshells at the counter I would not have made it out alive. Maybe shoppers are nicer about waiting in the UK. Not around here.
    Anyhow, I applaud you for encouraging people to take direct action.

Truly,

Liz Mann

Navigating By The Sun

Sun Microsystems, Menlo Park Campus
1601 Willow Road
Menlo Park, CA 94025

Dear Madam or Sir:

    I had the pleasure of viewing the environs surrounding your facility a couple of days ago. You and your colleagues at the Menlo Park campus must already be aware of what I discovered: that your neighborhood, while quite lovely, is not particularly pedestrian -friendly in spots. My husband began a project several months ago that involves walking around the bay, on the bay Trail as much as possible, with our young daughter and whoever else is inspired to join him. I have participated in his walks twice now (out of more than a dozen trips). I decided to join him on this particular day because I had a creeping suspicion that they might encounter unsafe conditions and I wanted to help keep them from peril.
    Indeed, there was a rather unfriendly stretch quite near to you -- I think it was on Willow, just across the intersection -- with fast cars and no sidewalks. Once we made it to safety we were at your door. We became a bit confused as to how to get back on track, as there was no obvious passage along the road in front of your property. I realize now that we could have found rather detailed information about the trail had we done more research online, but at the time we were relying on a Bay Trail map that did not show the trail winding behind your facility.
    Perhaps it is the responsibility of some local bureaucracy to provide signage for the trails, but since that sort of thing often gets done about ten years after it’s proposed, if at all, I thought I would drop a line suggesting that you put up a little sign directing hikers to the trail that goes around behind you. Then again, I would not be surprised if  we were the first and last folks who actually passed your way on foot.

Truly,

Liz Mann

P.S. What is that beautiful and strange tree between your place and the salt flats that grows orange-like fruits?

That Corporate Stamp

Deborah Edgerly
Oakland City Administrator
One City Hall Plaza, 3rd Floor
Oakland, CA 94612

Dear Ms. Edgerly:

    I was driving back from the west side of the bay the other day, and for a moment I thought I had lost my way. I had never before seen the exit “Monster Park,” but soon enough it occurred to me that Candlestick Park had changed its name again, before anyone became too accustomed to calling it “San Francisco Stadium at Candlestick Point” after forgetting to call it 3Com Park. The men in the orange vests from Cal Trans must be even more annoyed than the rest of us when they are sent up on those green signs that hover over the swift metal current of traffic to change the name so often. 
    I just learned, however, that the fed up folks of San Francisco passed a law that will return the stadium’s name to Candlestick again after Monster’s contract expires in 2008. How can we effect similar change in Oakland? It’s such a shame to let commercial references creep into every experience. I have no nostalgic memories of seeing the A’s play at McAfee Coliseum, but simply at Oakland Coliseum. The naming rights phenomenon has gradually gotten out of hand and it is nice to see that people have some recourse. Hospitals even change their names under private sponsorship. What if someone can’t find their hospital in an emergency because they do not know whet the latest name is?  Where does it end? A high school in Minnesota is placing ads in a school play! There is also potential for embarrassment, as a stadium in Arizona was nearly named Pink Taco.
    I hope the people of Oakland can take action and give the Coliseum its dignity and consistency back. Maybe if people take active interest in their venue the A’s will stay in Oakland!

Truly,

Liz Mann